Raw Vulnerability

Here’s the truth of it: I want to be raw with you. I want my open-hearted vulnerability to spill on to you so that we may experience the raw passionate intensity of true connection. Be my lover or just my friend, but let me see your rawness, give me your intensity.

I am no different from you, my humanness is your humanness. I am not more enlightened than you, I am merely on my unique human path. But you and I, we contain the same light and love of the universe. The same light and love of God. You pick the words that feel right to you. I may be your teacher and you my student, but you are also my teacher and I am also your student.

Here’s another raw truth: in my darkest moments, I feel unworthy, unfaithful, incapable, and burdensome. I feel [insert every horrible thought you have ever felt about yourself]. In my darkest moments I am moved to inaction. I try, hard, not to lessen my human experience and deny this pain because I should be more enlightened. I try not to bypass my pain, my anger, my fear because I should be more spiritually advanced. We should not be anything, we simply are. Spiritual bypass can be a damn bitch…making our humanness seem like the worst thing in the world just because we’ve studied with the Gods. But enlightenment is confronting that fear and pain and pessimism head on and walking straight towards it and saying “I am in pain, I am paralyzed by fear, I am lost in my unfaithfulness. But FUCK YOU! I am not my pain, I am not my paralysis, I am not lost in an abyss of nothing.” Enlightenment is knowing that you will come out the other side if you have the courage to do so. Enlightenment is having compassion for yourself and compassion for others, for we are all one. Enlightenment is finding the strength to stop the spread of fear and pain to others, no matter how much fear and pain you feel yourself.

I recently had an epic heart opening experience that left my heart gasping for faith.  The pain of having your beating emotional heart ripped from your chest is something we can all relate to. But for so many years I have kept my heart safely locked away from the prying hearts of others until that locked cage was busted open by passionate intensity. I am working my way through the darkness and am starting to see the light of love once more. Now I crave all of the intensity and rawness of vulnerability and anything less will not do. Superficial interactions will NOT do.

So be raw with me. Show me your truth. Be not afraid to release your heart from the lifetime of shackles it has collected. Or, be afraid but do it anyway. Be raw with me, open your heart so that your rawness, your intensity, your passion, your love and your light spill out onto me and everyone else. Be raw with me and with the world and find what fear has held you back from discovering: your connection to love and to light, your connection to the ever passionate and intense love of the universe. Be raw with me and I will love you despite yourself, I will love you just as you are.

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